What do you get when you pair the 2013 Mercedes-Benz SL63 AMG with a winding mountain road, mellow cello music, and Boris Becker? Ninety kilos of dead weight spoiling the ride with a spec-sheet narration.

This latest European-market commercial for the 530-horsepower, 590 pound-foot (or 557/664 with the AMG Performance Package) 2013 SL 63 gives us all of these, including a somewhat dejected Becker ejected from the passenger seat.

Boris, buddy, thanks for the laugh, but you should probably stick to tennis.