OMG, Eva Longoria, is that you being pulled over by one of LA's finest? (And if so, is he really one of LA's finest? Because the view from the back is, shall we say, not encouraging.)

How the bejeebus did you get a ticket? We can't imagine that anyone would pull you over for mere speeding violation. Did you run over a small child? Are you a getaway driver? Did kids plaster "Help us! We're being kidnapped!" signs in your back window? We only ask because we used to do the same thing on school field trips, and it tended to attract the attention of the authorities. Good times.

But hey, no matter what you've done, you're EVA LONGORIA fer chrissakes. You're a foxy cougar mama in a super sweet Lexus RX 400h. With your desperate housewife-ish ways, you can do anything you freakin' want. Just drop those Ray Bans to the tip of your nose, bat your eyelashes a couple of times, and be on about your business. Stop wasting our time making us think that you would even pause for a chat with a traffic cop -- unless it began with cosmopolitans and ended with sexy results.