We'd planned to write a story about Cameron Diaz being shuttled home in a black Cadillac Escalade after a late-night cuddle session with Alex Rodriguez. But as usual, C-Di and A-Rod put us to sleep, and when we woke up, our colleagues at Jalopnik had dug up something far more invigorating: news that Anna Nicole Smith's 1992 Mercedes-Benz 300SL (NOT pictured at left) is being auctioned off for charity. Or maybe not-charity.
Blonde bombshell + vintage roadster + auction always = YES.
As we understand it, Smith's frequent bedmate, Larry Birkhead, has been going through Anna's things for the past few months, "archiving and cataloging". Presumably some of that stuff will go to an as-yet-unannounced Anna Nicole Smith museum (you've been warned), but the rest is heading to an auction at the Planet Hollywood Resort & Casino in Las Vegas.
That seems pretty straightforward, but when Anna Nicole Smith is involved, you know there are curves ahead. Birkhead says that the money will go to support Dannielynn, the daughter he sired with Smith. But he also says, "We have more than enough to survive on. [Auction proceeds] would just supplement that". And then toward the end of the article, Us Magazine says that the proceeds will, in fact, "benefit the Anna Nicole and Daniel Wayne Smith Foundation".
So who are we to believe? All we know for sure is that Smith's common-law husband (who was once one of several men vying for the role of Dannielynn's genetic father) is rifling through his late common-law wife's things -- most of which arrived in her possession via her late church-married billionaire husband -- and picking out some items for a creepy Guess model shrine and putting the other stuff in a giant tag sale at the scene of her 2007 drug overdose to generate profits that may or may not go to support his daughter and/or a charitable foundation.
Which spells CLASS.