If you were raised by wolves before being brought back into society as an adolescent, you may not get the tie-in that Kia is trying to make with its Super Bowl ad for the Kia Optima, titled "A Dream Car For Real Life."

In popular folklore, the sandman visits us each and every night, sprinkling magic sand on our eyes to ensure a smooth trip to dreamland. Criminal trespass overtones aside, it stands to reason that sprinkling too much sand on a sleeping person could have unintended consequences.

In the case of Kia’s latest amusing and over-the-top big game ad, those consequences include supermodel Adriana Lima waving a checkered flag, 1980s hair band (and new Vegas regulars) Mötley Crüe performing live, pro bull rider Judd Lefew wrangling a giant rhino and a lumberjack sawing into the world’s largest hero sandwich.

Those certainly wouldn’t be our innermost desires, nor would we choose the otherwise excellent Kia Optima for turning hot laps on a racetrack. Throw a bucket of magic sand on our head, and you’ll likely get images of Sabine Schmitz, a BMW M3 CSL and the Nürburgring Nordschleife, with perhaps some catered barbeque.

That’s probably why we don’t write dream-sequence commercials for major advertisers. Still, things work out well for the characters in Kia’s ad, and we’ll admit that it made us crack a smile. It may not be the best 2012 Super Bowl commercial we’ve seen to date, but it’s certainly near the top of the list.