Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton

Okay, Paris Hilton: you are officially blowing our minds.

We used to think of you... well, how to put this diplomatically without hurting your feelings? We used to think of you as a faux-blonde, airheaded heiress whose only interests included partying, making sex tapes, and foisting a never-ending series of reality shows upon the poor, unsuspecting public.

Oh, how times have changed.

For starters, we've seen interviews recently in which you plainly admit to being a brand that's been consciously manufactured for public consumption and is nothing like the "real you". Even that wafer-thin veneer of self-awareness is a plus in our books.

We've also seen you pumping gas -- for a total stranger! -- which is, quite frankly, the best thing we've seen you do in a long time. (And we've seen you do a lot. A LOT.)

Now, the paps have captured you toodling around Los Angeles in a jet black Cadillac Escalade hybrid -- a big ass MFing ride that manages to get nearly twice the mileage of your "sporty" pink Bentley Continental GT and the blue Bentley Continental GTC we spotted you filling up. In other words, you're driving something that's eco-conscious, American-made, and roomy enough for all your friends when you go out clubbing. Plus -- and this is a big plus for some of your pals -- the Escalade sits high enough so that mini-skirted women can step out of the back seat without flashing their Dolly Madison to the cameras. Which you would've accomplished here, if those pants were a tad looser.