Etsy is a unique marketplace for all the handmade and vintage items you could ever want. Unfortunately it's also full of things no one should ever want, and many of them are car-themed. Here's our short list of what to avoid buying, or gifting, to the car person in your life.

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Car Scrap Jewelry
Whether it's a necklace, earrings, or a ring, save the car-parts scrap jewelry buys for costumes or Mr. T. No real person wants to wear this crap.

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Ridiculous Photos of Dogs Driving
Dogs playing poker, velvet Elvises, and dogs driving kids' push-cars. They all belong in a museum of tastelessness. Don't make your house that museum.

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Tacky USB Thumb Drives
We thought China had cornered the market on pointless car-related computer accessories, but it's comforting to know we Americans can still build tacky trinkets. Oh wait, we didn't build that; we just mashed a Hot Wheels car onto a USB drive.

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Gigantic Bows for Gifting Cars
Life is not a Lexus commercial, and we should all be thankful for that. Unless you're filming it for America's Most Prosaic Videos, just wrap the keys in a nice box.

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Awful Etsy car stuff, volume 1

Creepy Chain-Email Prayers Grafted Onto Kids Playing In Mustangs
So this one is a bit specific, but it threw us for a loop when we came across it. The kid in the photo is obviously having the drive of his life in his 5 mph Mustang. Why screw that up with a bunch of chain-email-driven puffery about world peace? Even the good car stuff can't sneak by.