Ten things that could give Bob Lutz the Big One:

10. Fireworks.

9. The return of clear soda.

8. Tragic watermelon incident at upcoming Gallagher festival.

7. Tragic golf club incident involving booth hostess and moving platform.

6. Richard Simmons' latest DVD, AC/DC Ab Workout. (That pilates stuff is hard.)

5. Migrating polar bears. (They have to go somewhere now that HUMMER melted all the icebergs.)

4. Another three-martini lunch.

3. Another two-Double Down dinner.

2. That next cigar.

1. Nicole "Coco" Austin's personal edition Cadillac CTS-V. (We're not sure which would get him first: that dress or the "COCO" badge on the back. Let's call it a tie.)