It's comforting to know that not all criminals are the masterminds depicted in movies and Jaguar commercials.

A would-be car thief in Cologne, Germany was foiled by the very vehicle he meant to steal, The Local reports.

Once he was inside, the Porsche Cayenne's doors locked themselves, and the thief was trapped inside. The 50-year-old man reportedly kicked the door in a panic, and was eventually detained after passersby called the police to report that he was trapped in the car.

MUST SEE: Front-Wheel Drive Drag Car Blows Tire, Self-Destructs On Dyno

According to the Cologne Police report, the fire department was prepared to forcibly open the Cayenne's door after emergency services arrived and found the man sitting in the back seat. Luckily, the owner showed up and unlocked the car with his key fob.

Not every criminal as that clueless, though. Better-equipped European car thieves are reportedly using cloned Near-Field Communication (NFC) fobs to steal vehicles. An apparent regulatory loophole allows thieves to program a blank key fob using a car's diagnostic port.

Still, technology isn't the only thing keeping unprepared car thieves from making off with other people's wheels.

Last month, three Massachusetts men jumped a food-delivery driver, taking his car and the food. The only problem was that the car had a manual transmission, which none of them knew how to operate.

_______________________________________

Follow Motor Authority on FacebookTwitter, and Google+.