No one is quite sure what came first: the automobile, or a name for it.

Giving cars people's names is as old as carmaking itself. Sure, some cars already have a name (Civic, Elantra, Tacoma) but those are mostly boring. Other cars have alphanumeric mashups that defy logic (XT5, Q30, X4 M40i) and those are certainly boring.

With their cute looks and gokart handling, Mini Coopers invite personification and additional names, in part, because they already have a person's name.

The first ever Mini census held this month revealed that the world's most popular name for Cooper was—drumroll—"Marvin." More surprisingly, a majority of Mini owners considered their cars to be male, not female.

Mini World Live conducted the survey, according to Motoring NZ. While we're not here to debate the merits of a worldwide study of car names, the results were fairly surprising.

Marvin was followed by Tommy and Jack, as the most popular male names for Minis. Female names skewed more alliterative: Mollie, Millie, and the least creative name possible, Minnie, were the leaders.

There were names that weren't listed in the survey, but should be, according to us:

• Mini Driver
• Mini Mum
• Princess Sophia Grace
• Me
• Winnie

If those aren't enough, Mini wrote a song about the names people gave their cars last year and made a video.

Our colleagues over at The Car Connection have their thoughts on the latest 2017 Mini Cooper/Clubman/convertible, in case you're looking to name your own. May we suggest Nolan?

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