Katie Couric helps push Barry Diller's Maserati out of the snowEnlarge Photo
We get it, Katie: YOU'RE A NICE PERSON.
You're perky. You're smart. You're a single mother, a cancer crusader, and gosh darnit, people like you.
But how, exactly, did this happen...?
KATIE: Barry! Fancy meeting you here, in the middle of Central Park.
BARRY: Well, as they say: the early bird gets the worm.
BARRY: Never mind. In more pressing news, I seem to have mired my car in the snow.
KATIE: Really? It doesn't look very "mired" to me.
BARRY: Well, looks can be deceiving. Remember when you took over the CBS Evening News, and it "looked" like it was going to be a ratings cakewalk?
KATIE: There's nothing wrong with my ratings, Barry. And stop trying to distract me from the issue at hand: forgive me if I'm wrong, but doesn't the Maserati GranCabrio transmission come with an "ICE Mode"?
BARRY: I've no idea what you're talking about.
KATIE: You know, a button you push to help navigate ice and, presumably, snow.
BARRY: [Blank stare]
KATIE: Okay, fine, I'll lend a hand, but I'd have thought you'd keep a traveling companion in the trunk for just these sort of problems.
BARRY: Oh, I do, but he's far too busy documenting my fabulous life to tackle menial labor. Look, if you push, I'll have him snap a photo of you in action, saving the day. That ought to make your publicist happy.
KATIE: I suppose it couldn't hurt. Here we go. [Katie throws her weight against the front fender]
BARRY: Hmm. I appreciate the effort, but you might have better luck attacking from behind.
DILLER'S PHOTOG: That's what HE said!